Mystifying use of bad German in books (by military people)

Did you ever notice those weird german sentences authors use in their books? There are lots of officers who start using german for no real reason I can understand.
I don't know whether you, dear reader, have ever read anything from that genre, but if you have you must have noticed the random german in them, especially common when combat draws near or they are already in the middle of something bad.
Things like 'nicht scheisse'. To all the military authors out there: no shit does NOT mean 'nicht scheisse'! It's supposed to be 'kein Scheiss'. Really. Ask any random german out there!
Therefore my plead: Stop it. It's not cool and even if german sounds hard and dangerous to most people there is no reason to cripple the poor language like that.
Oh and just in case you wanted to know: Germans usually don't argue in in the middle of the street en masse even if it sounds that way. Germans generally don't argue outside. It can be confusing, I guess, but that's just the language.
Anyway: The abuse of an innocent language is really stupid. Please stop putting google translations into your work. Ask somebody who has mastered it to do the translations even if it may be almost as hard as latin and much more confusing. Which is why you can't use google.
Ok, I must confess that I do laugh a lot when I read hopelessly confusing sentences in the middle of the most threatening situations in those military books. Those situations are among the best practical jokes I know.
But if they are after the main action and everything's in ruins and then this majors says 'Jetzt wir sind gehend zu Hause' it just kills the moment.
That's the sentence that made me write this article by the way.
I don't know whether anybody understood this sentence but I guess what they wanted to say was 'Now we are going home'. Unfortunately the german version of it is just crazy. The words can be translated that way, but they shouldn't. Basically it means that they are already at home and they are walking around. Plus the order is messed up.
If you know any authors like that please tell them to stop messing up their great books that way.

Just some thoughts about kids and tests

Hello!
I have a friend who wants to become a teacher. Don't ask me why anybody would want that job, I think it's so not good for a person to be forced to tell those kids that, no, they can't go to the toilet in groups, and no, make up during lessons is not allowed and no, you cannot talk about your weekend... Not to mention tests. Did anyone of you ever see what kind of c....strange things pupils write?
My favorite sentences are the ones without any sense at all. Because they are not so wrong it hurts. By the way, did you know that god created America as the perfect Land and then sent his servant Columbus to guide his chosen children to the blessed Land? I read that one in a HISTORY test she showed me. Now guess the question.
It was: When? W-H-E-N?! did Columbus discover America.
Interesting answer. At least the child could write.
And the letter they were supposed to write was interesting too. They were supposed to imagine that they were settlers and think of some problems to write to some kind of Governor or something.
I was amazed! Did colonists really use :-) and ;-) and °.° and :-( in their letters? Or words like 'Woah'? As far as I know those shouldn't be used except in informal e-mails.
The kids had other Ideas.
And I decided that I  wasn't like that. Never. For sure!
(I hope)

These are my favorite youtube songs (well, some of them):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NiBER0a2h8E&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDUmMqJB6Xc&list=FLzS2eyD-UO63hK1sbvYkraQ&index=2

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zbZdJHnuRvk&list=FLzS2eyD-UO63hK1sbvYkraQ&index=3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1YB617LaIkA&list=FLzS2eyD-UO63hK1sbvYkraQ&index=8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=99PytFJf-Xg&list=FLzS2eyD-UO63hK1sbvYkraQ&index=9

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=azW2mI_AgOY&list=FLzS2eyD-UO63hK1sbvYkraQ&index=53

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBNqNvP4JfU&list=FLzS2eyD-UO63hK1sbvYkraQ&index=57

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KByAaxJ84VY&feature=mfu_in_order&list=UL

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YTuWl8DoRhU&list=FLzS2eyD-UO63hK1sbvYkraQ&index=105

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rc6maCBAAnU&list=FLzS2eyD-UO63hK1sbvYkraQ&index=114

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jhr4tRGYhmU&list=PL3683FA32D62C10AF&index=38

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQNN5kCbQcQ

I know, this blog seems to be completely random, but there really is an Idea hidden in the chaos
...somewhere...

An old story I found

I just found one of my fifth grade stories.
It's really cute and I never realized that I used to be that good at making up stories.
Basically that was my Knights and Wizards time, a little late I guess, but I really really loved them. Now throw King Arthur and a little Harry Potter together and you get the following (modified) story:

Pete's Adventure

The day was sunny and a little chilly and Pete had to sit at home to help his grandmother with her knitting.

He was a boy, damn it all! Why did he have to do such girly stuff? He was almost sure that his older sister would have had fun helping Granny while eating mint cookies and listening to opera. Well, maybe not exactly, but she probably wouldn’t have been this bored. She had become sick intentionally so she couldn’t come and visit the countryside, of that he was absolutely sure. She and that stupid boyfriend of hers who had destroyed his snowman he’d worked so hard on not a month ago. And now he was ‘being taken care of’ by his Grandmother while his parents were out to visit some friends or something.

It was really really frustrating.

Finally his chance to escape came when the old woman decided that she ought to start cooking. It was still 2 hours until noon and Pete really couldn’t understand what she wanted to do with that much time – please, no more chocolate ‘surprise’ cakes…

He just jelled something about ‘forest’ and ‘exploring’ and ran outside before she could object or make him wear gloves and jacket. They just didn’t feel right with sunshine and green leafs.

The forest was one of those old, mysterious ones nobody ever walked around in on all those tourist paths and whatnot. He couldn’t even practice in those kinds of places! Well, the only place he could really do something in were rooms nobody could look into, but forests and magic belonged together, he’d seen enough movies about that!

Besides, his dad said that there were a few spirits left inside that forest and there was supposed to be a circle, as well. But who would believe that except him? Not even his sister had inherited anything so she didn’t know and the thought that her family might a witch and a wizard in it would seem ridiculous to her. But Pete was getting desperate. His mother didn’t have much power, but he did! And she couldn’t teach him much.

He still recalled the first time she wanted him to try growing something from a nut. She had managed a little white something, but he had gotten a fully grown tree out of it. Fortunately that had been when they were mountain climbing so nobody noticed the extra tree.

And he wasn’t even allowed to try out just how much power he actually had because he could hardly do that in his room. That was so frustrating.

But here he had such a great forest and mountains and lots of lakes so nobody would notice some unusual rain or more trees or lightning in weird shapes or flying little boys.

After he had started really using his powers though something…shifted. He felt watched. It was as if his magic had roused the attention of something.

He fell out of the air, fortunately not too high because of the branches above him, and flopped onto the soft moss. That had not been his doing, for sure! Something had made him fall!

All of a sudden a tiny creature in a green suite became visible. A suit made of silk. Pete had seen silk before because his mother’s expensive gown was made of it. But this suit had patches of brown silk on its knees and elbows. And there was a Beetle around his neck. Aside from that he looked like a very tiny, normal man and he was smiling. In other words, not scary.

After some thought Pete smiled back at him.

‘You know, you’re making a magical mess here.’ The mini-man commented. ‘Usually I’d fine you, but you don’t seem to be from around here.’ A little stick appeared in his hands, one of those his grandmother used. Except this stick was green and shiny and not made of wood.

‘Uh…no?’ Pete was somewhat shaken. The thing certainly talked like a grown up.

The man nodded solemnly. ‘Then you should know that excessive use of otherworldly power is not permitted in these parts due to the risk of disturbance. For questions and help please call this number.’ He human sized piece of paper with a phone number on it appeared in midair. It floated down to land on top of the still baffled Pete.

‘And before I forget it: You may be strong, but you are wasting an awful lot of magic. For proper education to prevent accidents please get in touch with the Agency of Development.’ Another sheet appeared.

‘Good day then, sir, and please try to act in accordance with the laws.’ The little man bowed and turned around, muttering: ‘Damn almighty wizards these days, no respect, no respect…’

It took Pete several minutes to recover from the experience. When he finally did get a grip he got up, put the numbers into his pocket and ran straight back to his grandmother.
He'd had enough weird things happening around him for the monent and, he thought, surprise cake wasn't so bad after all.

The Pope = that little guy with the funny hat

It's amazing how some people describe the Pope. Or how much, or rather, how little, they actually know.
First a little list about weird not really correct facts:
- the Pope is the ruler of Rome   <-since when? maybe Vatican=Rome in somebody's head
- he's from Poland                      <- wasn't that the last one?
- he's responsible for all christians  <- alright so it seems like only the catholics are christians and the others are not...yeah, right
- last but not least this description: the little guy with the funny hat.....maybe he's a comedian or something?
I'm sure there are a lot more weird, wrong and strange things people have heard about this so called infallible man, dear reader, and I'd be delighted to tell you more (or to hear more), but unfotunately there are bloggers with a life of their own, too.
After all, what on earth would I be able to talk about if all I did was to sit in a room and wait for something to happen? I can only hope that you have your own life too, as I'm quite sure you do.

But now I'm babbling again.

Yesterday I really did manage to write that annoying little story without any of this, too. Does anyone know how I did that?
Because I forgot what I wanted to say about those descriptions and now half of my post is my musing about nothing, really.
O-kay.
Anyway.
I really do wonder how some people can bury their heads in the sand like that, because that's the only explanation I have. Just like some people believe that Europe's a country there are some who really don't have a clue who or what a Pope is supposed to be.
I can only hope that my dear readers aren't as confused. Really, I do!

Btw, comments are appreciated. How do I write a post without getting off topic? I doubt that I can do it even with instructions, but one never knows.

For now bye and have fun in your own life!
And I really do hope that you understand what I'm trying to say here. I can always hope, right?

I'm so stupid...maybe

Yesterday I was asked to go and get some pizza for me and my friends. Pretty normal.
I collected the money and then started searching for my key.
My key was in the kitchen.
After I'd found it I went out to go to the place just two minutes from my place and ordered.
I sat there for about fifteen minutes until the pizza was ready - and THEN I discovered that my money was not in my pocket - it was still in the kitchen where I'd found my key.
So, I run back home, get the money, run back and find out that they had just sold (or rather, delivered to someone) my pizza to someone else because I was gone. What had happened? The part-timer had forgotten to tell his boss that I wanted to return right away. He thought it was funny. Well, at least one person was amused.
So I sat there for another 15 minutes. Suddenly my phone rang and said friends who had asked me to get pizza for them said that they were tired of waiting and that somebody we all know and I don't like had a birthday party. And they were going there. If I wanted to come, too? Why on earth would I want to go to a party of a person I barely know and don't really like at all?
Obviously I declined.
They went anyway. They told me that I could keep the money since I'd already ordered.
And then the pizza was ready.
So I had 3 pizzas I could pay and nobody to eat them anymore.
But I also got some leftover money so that's one good point.
And probably lunch for a week....by the way, how long can you keep pizza in the fridge?

Nothing in particular

This is a blog.
Meaning, I can write whatever I wish. Like what my cats had for breakfast.
Well, I guess that might not be very interesting.
But meh. Starting a blog is always difficult. These are the first words people will ever read from you, after all. They might never visit this one again if the beginning is boring!
I could just start writing about how I saw this cute guy in the park recetly. Unfortunately I don't like guys who just happened to look good when I saw them for a minute, just because they happened to be oh-so good looking. And I'm not such a simple person that I would just...
Now I'm off topic. That's your fault! Don't read this stuff, you're making me nervous.
Anyway.
This is not about what my cat had for breakfast or cute guys in the park but about me.
Unfortunately I have no intention whatsoever of telling you who I am or what I do. I guess you might figure that I'm a woman, but maybe I'm just a homosexual or a little kid trying to be interesting, too.
Now that I think about it the way I do this could be described that way. The little kid part, I mean.
Alright, so this is a blog by a sometimes not very grown up person about nothing in particular.
Well...at least I'm smart. I was born that way, but I'm still smart. That's one good thing about me.

Oh my god. Totally off topic! Great. Now I forgot what I wanted to write.

Of course I could spreat senseless rumors. Unfortunately...or maybe fortunately...I'm not that kind of person.
Or I could use this blog to write short stories. Or a journal. But what kind of reader wants to read random stories from nobody special. And by the way I just wrote 'king of reader' by accident ^u^
Maybe talk about my new shirts or how some kids were drinking in front of the station and how horrible I think that is. They even asked me to buy them some more! Crazy kids, for real. Dead drunk 14 year olds in the middle of the night. It's kind of sad.
But I don't want to talk about that, either.
In this blog you will read the scatter braines thoughts of a person you don't know at all.
I'd really like to see how many people there are who actually want to do that.

Well, one thing's for sure: I didn't write anything meaningful in this first post.
Maybe I should have.
But who cares? Nobody's forcing you, dear reader, to actually read this.